Micheal Cobley

Interstellar Tactics




Primeval Episode 8: Let's Rant! – or – Jack Must Die!

Posted on May 16th 2009 | 9 Comments so far

Just in case y’all are wondering, I’m recording tonight’s episode 8 for viewing tomorrow, mebbe. Meantime, me and SuperSusan are just heading off to see the new Trek movie. Ye cannae change the laws o’ physics, allegedly!


Star Trek The Reboot was pretty good, thanks for asking. A nonstop rollercoaster of spills and thrills, with lots of not-bad witty character bits dotted through it like chocchips in a tasty croissant-type snack.

As for Primeval Episode 8, seriously, the Jack character serves no other function other than to get the team mixed up in a bit of bovver. Must admit that the future desolate London looked terrific, and the mantis Vs bat-predator smackdown was pretty good. But this is ultimately scenery and effects – the plotting, motivations and dialogue are as clodhoppingly vacuous as ever. I won’t go into exhaustive detail, other than to state if I were venturing into the vicinity of an anomaly (never mind going through one) I’d be wearing kevlar and toting a heavy-duty trank gun with an assault weapon for backup. And talking of backup – why, why, WHY did they go haring off to investigate an anomaly without taking along a squad of hefty blokes armed to the teeth?


As for Jack The Unbearable driving a car into the anomaly so we can get to see the other side - ie behaving like a clueless fudder – well, like I said, that’s his function. So help me, I could do better plotting in my sleep. How about this – the team figure out from a captured insect that its the future on the other side so they get tooled up in an armoured personnel carrier and drive that over to the other side (after sending a mobile camera through to get some pictures – why has no-one figured that one out yet?). Once there, they venture forth for a spot of investigating and, darn it, get jumped by a pack of the batoid nasties; they get split up, one lot having to fend off the beasties with some weird weapons found in a storage facility, the others finding an underground lab along with folders of dusty notes detailing the end of the world. Unfortunately, the mantis buggers are holed up down there too so our valiant investigators use some handy chemicals to blow the underground lab, thus forcing the mantises to the surface – cue a return to the APC and thence back out of the anomaly.

Hmm, yeah, like it. Beats the hell out of the idiotic suckfest that they gave us instead.

Posted in Movies, on writing, science fiction, space | Tagged , , , , , ,